Our good friend Oliver is back with another guest blog entry. What does that make it? Two entries in two days, that’s what! At this pace, I will become a full-time editor, and Trung Chatter will slowly morph into Oliver and Trung Chatter! In this entry, Oliver analyzes the consumption of vitamins–from an anarchist perspective, of course. Thanks again for the contribution!
Vitamins are good for you. No, vitamins are bad for you. Wait a minute; certain vitamins are good, and certain vitamins are bad. Am I sure? Well, maybe, maybe not. It depends on what sex you are, what weight you are, how tall you are, what your family history is, where you live, what your genetics are like, what your diet is like, how old you are, and what your medical history is. The list continues.
Also, is it okay to consume lots of vitamin B? It may not be that harmful, but it may not be very beneficial depending on your condition. Regardless, excess vitamin B will get passed through your urine, through the sewer system, into the water system, and dispersed into the local water table, which then can increase the presence of fungal blooms. If, also, your dog drinks from the toilet, the vitamin excess could give him cancer.
I have several questions. If vitamins are good or bad, why in the first place are we taking them? Who told us we need them? Did the institution of capitalism create a market given the knowledge of their existence? Did a profiteer think that with the invention of Vitamins, people could eat whatever they wanted and still get their essential nutrients with the instant convenience of popping a little pill?
My biggest fear is that the health care industry wants a monopoly on human life, and while we are in this great recession, people are probably foregoing a doctor’s visit for an extra dose of vitamins C, E, and B-complex, and it might work! But the health care industry needs help making people sick, so it needs to get rid of those pesky vitamins.
What’s next? A health-care-industry-funded story on how vegetables are bad for us? Or maybe it was a secret industrial espionage contracted firm that put E.coli into the spinach supply last summer, wanting us to deprive our bodies of iron, which all Americans have low levels since the invention of teflon and its replacement of cast iron cookware. With all the recent studies out now that taking vitamins is essentially ineffective and quite possibly harmful, what happens next? Will vitamin water companies stay in business? Will people opt for healthier diets?
By the way, one doctor told me after I inquired about vitamins, “People who take vitamins have very expensive urine”. He explained it to me in terminology that went over my head that basically vitamins get absorbed in the intestine.
If vitamins are from fruits and vegetables, they are bound to the fiber and get extracted on the slow ride down. If they are taken with water (and almost all are water soluble), they fly right through. The doctor said a simple trick is to take a vitamin B pill then pee in a cup. After waiting a week, eat something high in fiber with vitamin B, then compare the urine samples. Guess what? I did it. Spare yourself the urine storage. Just listen to me and your grandma “AND EAT YOUR DAMN VEGETABLES”–preferably raw and preferably organic.